Conflicted about My Kids

I am in a real quandary here, folks, and I need some help. It involves a couple of my children.

First, my oldest son, Matt, has just gotten an offer letter from MIT. They are giving him a full ride scholarship and a generous stipend to go to MIT and be a masters/doctoral student for the next few years and to be a research assistant.

That is all well and good, of course, but I have a real issue with this. It's the M in MIT. It stands for Massachusetts and is in the Boston area. Boston, as you may well know, is the source of all evil in the world - home of the Boston Red Sox.

Can I support my son as he moves to Babylon, to the seat of world evil? It is a tough choice.

Now, my youngest son, Ben, also presents me with a difficult choice. When he came to me as a freshman and said, "I'm quitting basketball next year to concentrate on Show Choir" - I gave him his freedom - ignoring the knife in my back. It worked out pretty well, getting him a full-ride music scholarship.

But next week, he is performing at Morningside College in a night of OPERA. Yes, folks, I said OPERA!

Here's the question: am I expected, as a father, to attend a night of opera music to support my son. I sat through hours and hours of show choir. Haven't I done enough?

Someone, please, give me some good advice.

Conflicted about My Kids

I am in a real quandary here, folks, and I need some help. It involves a couple of my children.

First, my oldest son, Matt, has just gotten an offer letter from MIT. They are giving him a full ride scholarship and a generous stipend to go to MIT and be a masters/doctoral student for the next few years and to be a research assistant.

That is all well and good, of course, but I have a real issue with this. It's the M in MIT. It stands for Massachusetts and is in the Boston area. Boston, as you may well know, is the source of all evil in the world - home of the Boston Red Sox.

Can I support my son as he moves to Babylon, to the seat of world evil? It is a tough choice.

Now, my youngest son, Ben, also presents me with a difficult choice. When he came to me as a freshman and said, "I'm quitting basketball next year to concentrate on Show Choir" - I gave him his freedom - ignoring the knife in my back. It worked out pretty well, getting him a full-ride music scholarship.

But next week, he is performing at Morningside College in a night of OPERA. Yes, folks, I said OPERA!

Here's the question: am I expected, as a father, to attend a night of opera music to support my son. I sat through hours and hours of show choir. Haven't I done enough?

Someone, please, give me some good advice.

Some YouTubes of Ben

Here are some videos of Ben performing. I wish I knew how to put these things in here, but these are links to YouTube videos

His solo in "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zg8cLA7ASQs&feature=channel_page

His performance in "Les Mis" which won the banner (state championship) in musical theatre - this is a practice performance, but its the only one I've got. He's in the gray pants and black shirt - the narrator at the beginning and first soloist.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vju7rHAvukQ

Soloist on this one is Matt Walker, but Ben is mugging and dancing. I just loved the dance sequences, so it goes up here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qr25bXLZUX0&feature=channel_page

Here, he's Corny Collins in "Nicest Kids in Town" in East High Headliners, his show choir.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HL-dN1fLo7c&feature=channel

Some YouTubes of Ben

Here are some videos of Ben performing. I wish I knew how to put these things in here, but these are links to YouTube videos

His solo in "Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zg8cLA7ASQs&feature=channel_page

His performance in "Les Mis" which won the banner (state championship) in musical theatre - this is a practice performance, but its the only one I've got. He's in the gray pants and black shirt - the narrator at the beginning and first soloist.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vju7rHAvukQ

Soloist on this one is Matt Walker, but Ben is mugging and dancing. I just loved the dance sequences, so it goes up here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qr25bXLZUX0&feature=channel_page

Here, he's Corny Collins in "Nicest Kids in Town" in East High Headliners, his show choir.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HL-dN1fLo7c&feature=channel

Pillars in the Temple

Solomon’s temple was one of the great structures of the Ancient Near East, a magnificent edifice erected for the worship of the Living God. The early chapters of 2 Chronicles record way more information than we might desire: details about pomegranates and cubits and cherubim.

Then 2 Chronicles 3:17 says that Solomon erected two pillars in the front of the temple; one on the south end, one on the north end. He named the pillars “Jakin” and “Boaz.” Why would Solomon name the pillars? The meaning of the names gives us a hint.

Jakin means “he will establish.” Boaz is less clear, but is thought to mean, “in him is strength.” Solomon knew what we must learn. It is God who establishes our lives and our work, and it is he who gives us the strength to accomplish his work. Solomon built the temple, but he was sure to acknowledge who established it, and who gave the strength.

Twenty-one years ago, I entered an amazing new era in my life. My wife gave birth to the first of our four kids. Nine years later I drove into Cedar Rapids with a big job at a small church. Both are stressful and terrifying jobs. In the process I have often forgotten Solomon’s lesson. I sometimes think it all depends on me.

Then, God will gently remind me that Jakin and Boaz are the pillars of my family and my church, even my own Christian life. I am not in this alone. God himself will establish me, and I can depend on his strength as I do his will. It does not all depend on me.

Nearly forty years ago, God drew me into his kingdom. I was just a 6-year-old kid. What did I know about the Christian life? But I was in good hands. The God who saved me by his grace would establish my life in his ways. Saving me, sanctifying me, setting my feet on solid rock – it was his work, not mine. He is my Jakin. He is my Boaz, strengthening me along the way.

Sometimes I forget that. I start to think that I have to be in control, that I have to “make it happen.” If I don’t do it, it won’t get done. But when I feel this way, I am taking the role of God. I am trying to be my own Jakin, my own Boaz. What folly.

Dear friend, do you feel like it all depends on you? Do you feel like the man who kept 12 plates spinning on top of little poles? If he stopped spinning the plates, they would come crashing down. You are stressed out, fearful, overwhelmed, weighed down by life’s cares.

They are not your plates and it is not your job to keep them spinning. God has it all in control and doesn’t need your help. He desires your worship, your love, your devotion, your obedience. But he can keep the world spinning without your assistance.
He is your Jakin, who will establish your life, your family, your church, your ministry, by his might, his wisdom, his power. He will be your Boaz, strengthening you to do all he has called you to do.

God is in control, not you or me. Aren’t you glad?

The Blogging Gulag: Addition by Subtraction

I used to spend most of my blogging time on about 4 or 5 blog sites. I got into blogging because of the IMB controversy, and most of the sites I visited dealt with those SBC issues. I am passionate about the issues, but I would get so disgusted at the level of conversation and frustrated at the lack of real conversation. I wrongly assumed this was the sum total of Baptist blogging.

It has been an eye-opening experience and a blessing to find that those strife-producing, name-calling, anger-inducing sites are not all there is out there. There are real sites where people deal with real topics; where there is intelligent discussion of difficult issues with grace and kindness.

Of course, I think SBC Impact is the best of those sites. I'm probably a little prejudiced. But there are several others. SBC Voices not only has some great articles, it has the links to so many good blogs (and the stinkers as well). Bart Barber always makes me think, and only rarely makes me mad. Timmy Brister is also thought-provoking and there have been some really good comment exchanges there. Ed Stetzer has loads of stuff for me to learn and everyone ought to read "Between the Times" - even if they make me crazy by not allowing comments. There is a whole world of good blogs I didn't know existed. (I know, its my stupidity, but lets ignore that).

So, I have created my own blogging gulag. I have banished the petty arguers to Gulag Millerpeligo. I just stopped going there. I deleted them from my feed. And now, my blood pressure has dropped 20 points and I no longer see red as often. It is a liberating experience.

I don't have to read every wild accusation lodged against Dr. Patterson or those with traditional views of gender roles. I don't have to read the insulters who respond to the insults of Dr. P by insulting the original insulter. I am surviving without my daily dose of anti-SBC vitriol. Neither do I have to live in a Mad, Mad, Mad world or watch anyone Splat! Splat! anyone else. All I had to do was walk away.

Here's the thing I realized. These sites accomplish nothing. They insult each other and others. they harp and rail - and NOTHING changes.

I'm so glad there are better blogs. It has been a blessing to find them.

I wonder why I didn't figure this out sooner? After all, my IQ is well above 80.

There Is a Way That Seems Right

Years ago, we were headed from Disney World to my parent’s home in Kissimmee. We came to a major turn, and I did not know where to go. So, I asked my dad. “Which way?” He told me, “Dave, everything in me tells me that you should probably turn right, so if I were you, I would turn left.”

I did. I turned left. Within a few minutes, we were home, safe and sound. Dad was right. His instincts were wrong. He has no sense of direction. He once stopped for coffee and got back on the highway and drove 100 miles before he realized he was headed in the wrong direction. We got home that night because my dad realized it; he recognized that he was directionally-impaired. Had we relied on his instincts, we would have been lost.

We are constantly bombarded with the message of self-reliance today. “You just need to follow your own instincts. Listen to the truth inside of you. It can’t be wrong if it feels right to you.”

But Solomon said, “There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end, it leads to death.” Let that sink in. There is a road that leads to death and destruction. It is the wrong road. Yet, to the human heart, it seems right. It feels right, but it is wrong.

Dad was wise; he knew his instincts were wrong. Too many people trust their own instincts, their feelings, their reason and logic. It feels right, but it leads us wrong. Sinful hearts and minds cannot be trusted to lead us the right way.

Solomon gave us a solemn promise in Proverbs 3:5-6. He said that if we did three things, God would direct our paths, or “make our paths straight”. In other words, we can live confidently, knowing that we are on the right road, knowing that we are making the right turns in life.

What do we have to do? We have to “trust in the Lord with all your heart.” We must place our trust fully in God. We place our lives in his hands, believing that God’s way is better than our way, that God’s Word is more reliable than our own wisdom, that his will is best for our lives.

Then comes the hard part. “Do not lean on your own understanding.” If I want God to lead me every step of my life, I cannot trust my own wisdom. Every great truth of scripture is counter-intuitive. That means it goes against our normal human way of thinking. It is not normal to love your enemy. It is not normal to rejoice in suffering. It is not normal to have peace while the storms of life rage. It is not normal, it is supernatural. God’s ways are higher than ours, and his thoughts are higher than ours. Like my dad, we refuse to trust our instincts, our emotions, our reason or even our own common sense. Instead, we seek the truth of God’s word.

Finally, we must acknowledge God in all our ways. We must submit every word, every thought, every action before God. To acknowledge God is to submit to him, to let him have authority over everything we do.

God does not want to be a passenger in your life. He wants the steering wheel. But when I slide over, and release the wheel to him, he guides me through life’s ways in joy and peace. I experience his love and blessing every day.

There is a way that seems right. And there is a right way.

Only Sinners Get a Savior!

Little Connie sat in my office, wanting to “ask Jesus into her heart.” I explained the entire story to her: God’s holiness, our sin, Jesus’ sacrifice on the cross, and her need to trust Jesus as Savior and Lord. Then, I questioned her to see if she understood. “Connie, have you ever sinned?” “No.” I was a little shocked. I tried to explain sin to her again, thinking she must not be understanding me clearly. She stuck to her story. Little Connie wanted a Savior, but did not want to admit she needed one. She was blinded to her own sin.

Connie and I faced the amazing paradox of Christianity. Joy comes in the morning. We can only see the morning joys of salvation after the dark night of repentance. To be forgiven of sin, one must come face to face with the dark depravity of the soul.

And no one wants that. We like to rationalize our sinful attitudes and actions, justify them in the light of the actions of others or our circumstances, and enlist others to support us in our ungodliness. The last thing we ever want to do is turn on the light and see the filth.

That is a work of the Spirit in our hearts. He shines the light and makes us see ourselves for what we are. When Isaiah saw himself he cried, “Woe is me, I am undone.” It is never pleasant to see our human hearts as they really are. Not much fun.

In Psalm 130, the Psalmist says, “If you, O Lord, kept a record of sins, O Lord, who could stand?” He cried to God “out of the depths” of sin. He did not boast before God, he cried out for mercy. Each of us must come to that point of spiritual bankruptcy before we can experience the riches of God’s grace.

But here is the paradox: when I see my sin for all it is, when I am dismayed at my own wickedness, without excuse or justification, I receive the most amazing gift any human can receive – complete, wonderful, full, amazing forgiveness.

The Psalmist admitted that no one could stand before God’s record of sins, but then he realizes, “with you there is forgiveness.” In verse 7 he states that with God there is “unfailing love” and “full redemption.” When I took my sin to the Cross of Christ and laid it before him, I received grace. GRACE. God does not treat me on the basis of my sin. He relates to me “in Christ.”

It is hard to accept that. Human relationships are conditional, often temporary. It is hard to understand the awesome forgiveness of God. I still sin. I still fail my Savior, and I do it every day. But, GRACE! Amazing Grace! God’s forgiveness is more powerful than my own sin. He convicts me, restores me, renews me, and establishes me in his righteousness. Like the Psalmist, I have not only been redeemed, I have experienced “full redemption.”

Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound, that saved a wretch like me. I once was lost, but now am found, was blind, but now I see.

Don’t be afraid to face yourself and your sin. In Christ, there is forgiveness and full redemption. That is why they call it Amazing Grace. .